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This book was recommended by a friend, and "limbic resonance" became the catch-phrase of the day. These insights are things we intuitively know, but it helps put them into an interesting science-based perspective that helps make sense of our patterns.
You'll also be more apt to recognize when intimacy is absent."A General Theory of Love" is a short read, but thick with content. This is a great book if you are interested in the development of human intimacy--be it raising children, finding the love of your life, or connecting with people in the workplace. It is not one of those books that after the first three chapters, you know all there is to know about the subject. As a leader, you will learn valuable information about how to anticipate and handle emotional responses (both yours and team members') when complicated situations arise.The book reveals how we communicate and how we develop silent rhythms with other people. After reading it, you will be far more attuned to patterns of intimacy. Every chapter is fresh and builds on the previous ones, so you will really want to read to the end. A General Theory of Love
The latter half focuses more on children, mal-adjusted people, and psychotherapy, which sort of took me by surprise since I wanted to know more about love in general vs. I loved the interplay of science and poetry in this book. The first half of the book, which touches on the evolution of emotional intelligence and the nature of memory, is fascinating. what happens to children who grow up without it. But I still enjoyed the book very much and see creatures with limbic systems in a new light.
So I think I owe it a belated thanks and 5 stars. It has been a long time since I read this book. Today I was browsing amazon and I came across this and remembered how much I loved it. Whether you're a therapist, a parent, in love, out of love, or a lonely soul incapable of finding or maintaining love, this gem will provide you amazing insight and knowledge on how love works, why it's so crucial to humans (and animals) and most importantly how we choose to love the ones we love (not that it's a matter of choice). It is science, literature, and self-help, all delivered in a pleasant and easy-to-read style.
Because the human brain and nervous system is capable of laying down new patterns, psychotherapy can help change those limbic patterns through affective attunement and regulation so that we are better able to sustain positive relationships.This book is a breakthrough in explaining the science of emotions, relationships and the value of psychotherapy. Whatever the limbic connecting pattern is, it tends to get repeated throughout life, and especially shows up in our intimate relationships.
Therapists working from contemporary, "relational" theoretical orientations concern themselves with the client's transference and the therapist's countertransference. The authors demystify the subject of 'transference', and put it in relational, not Freudian terms: the client's unconscious interacting with the therapist's unconscious, the client's limbic system connecting to the therapist's limbic system.The authors begin by explaining that infants are born with their limbic systems "open" and unregulated, and they need their mother's closeness to get regulated.
This book describes, in easy to read scientific language, the heart of what goes on in psychotherapy. The authors then describe 'attractors', patterns that are imprinted on the limbic system, through childhood limbic connections.
As in most interpersonal and relational psychoanalytic theory and research, this relationship is shown to be a two-way thing: the mother also needs the limbic connection with her baby, in order to be emotionally regulated. We need a limbic connection with another, to be successfully regulated.
This explains how and why we choose partners that match our parents in some limbic way and that may or may not be good for us. Read it now.
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